Double Dong
Twice the Fun for One!
I ordered this dildo on Amazon like most of my toys. However, unlike my other additions, this Double Dong was not affiliated with any major brand or company, and the original seller does not even exist on the website anymore. I opted to purchase from them anyway because they offered fast and free shipping, and the quality and cost of the product passed my requirements. So, I ordered one up and waited patiently for my toy to arrive.
Now, at the apartment I lived in at the time, the post office in charge of my zone was notorious for providing some of the worst service in the entire city. The lazy deliverers never bothered to leave notice slips in my mailbox to alert me that I had a package waiting, and the office workers hardly lifted a finger to help when my mail went missing. A week or so after ordering the Double Dong, I noticed Amazon marked my toy as delivered a few days ago and, of course, the postman left no slip to inform me of this. I drove to the post office in a sour mood and approached the clerk behind the desk. When I explained that I had yet again another package missing and provided my name and address, the woman's eyes suddenly lit up in an unpleasant way, and she said, "Oh, so that's your package!" I had no clue what she meant by that until she retrieved it from the back room.
Never again will I take the "discreet shipping" feature for granted. Accompanied by snickering from her coworkers, the woman returned with my "package" in her hands. I flushed all the way to my ears when I saw it. You didn't need much of an imagination to know exactly what was wrapped in that thin brown paper. No box, no tube, just a thick eighteen-inch sausage wrapped in packing paper and tape with my address slapped on the outside. You could very clearly discern the shape of the toy from the two bulbous heads on each end to the thick veins on the surface, and it wobbled when you shook it slightly. I wordlessly took the quivering package and left the post office as quickly as my feet could carry me. I refrained from making any further online purchases until I could comfortably show my face at that branch again.
As I mentioned in my little narrative, I ordered this toy from Amazon like most of my early additions. Unfortunately, like the Trinity Deluxe Rabbit, the company (whoever they are) no longer circulates this specific model. Similar models exist elsewhere such as on Adam & Eve, but they generally cost a little more than the $15 I paid. For example, the replica on Adam & Eve retails for $24.95, a smidgen of a price jump but not unreasonably so. I also don't believe this toy is strictly affiliated with any definite company as it seems to be a generic template that anyone can use, so it's readily available if you know where and what to look for. Unlike my previously reviewed toys, the Double Dong is substantially larger in size, no longer falling on the "average" scale. The length is 18 in (45.7 cm) giving you and/or your partner a gratuitous 9 in (22.9 cm) to work with on each end. The diameter, a girthy 1.75 in (4.4 cm)/5.5 in (13.9 cm) circumference, is not for beginners or those with tight entrances. With a little coaxing and copious amounts of lube, I can work it inside me, but unfortunately my lady stands no chance against it whatsoever.
The texture of this toy drives me absolutely wild, and the girth means I feel every inch of it pressing against me. The top half of the Double Dong offers a heavily ribbed surface resembling a fishbone pattern. It runs the entire length of the dildo and tapers to an utterly smooth underside. Although the toy provides flexibility around the middle, the solid body allows the ends to retain most of their shape giving these ridges a lovely stiffness. They feel exactly the way you expect and hope a ribbed texture ought to feel inside you, and it never fails to throw me into helpless states of ecstasy. As an added bonus, although the heads are thick, their slick surface makes insertion easier than expected from a toy of this size. Once you work the head all the way in, you're golden for the rest of the ride.
Little detail is given on the material type of this toy. While confirmed that the Double Dong is made from silicone, it is most likely from a low-grade quality as the exterior lacks that subtle silky-smooth sensation of medical-grade silicone. The toy initially emits a slight rubbery smell that takes several washes to remove. And, obnoxiously, this toy adores sticking to surfaces and having scraps stick to it. It latches onto hair and fuzz like a magnet so if you accidentally drop it on your carpet, you'll be spending the next five minutes attempting to rinse off every last fiber. Given its large size, general storage is already an issue, but if stored for long periods of time with the slightest kink or bend in it, this will permanently cause the toy to retain a crooked shape. I accidentally stored mine in a small box with my other toys, and almost a year later, I'm still trying to completely straighten the U-bend out of the middle. Just be conscious of how and where you store yours.
I originally purchased this toy with the intent of sharing it with my lady, but in hindsight, this was an ambitious undertaking. Unlike me (the size queen), her physical limits exist on the opposite side of the spectrum as mine, and she can't even fit half of the head inside her, so this toy is reduced to my solo use only. If you and your partner can manage the girth, it makes for an excellent dual experience. For solo use, it's a fun double-penetrative tool due to its flexibility. I chiefly use it vaginally but have tried both ends at the same time on a few occasions.
As mentioned, the Double Dong boasts a substantial girth, but I have an easy enough time sliding it in vaginally when properly lubricated. As enjoyable as it is, the major gripe I have involves the unused portion shimmying above me and all over the place. Thrusting causes waves to vibrate through the whole length like an eel out of water and takes you out of the moment when it continuously bangs against your leg. I find it much more manageable when my lady holds the opposite end and provides the piston force for me. Anal, on the other hand, requires much more patience, coaxing, and copious amounts of lube. While I find the sensation appealing, the head is too large for it ever to feel comfortable no matter how much I relax. The shape and structure is too unyielding for such a sensitive area. I can manage to fit both ends inside me at once, but one part must always remain stationery because there is simply not enough room inside my body to maneuver both at once. It causes both heads to crush the thin wall of tissue separating them in a very painful manner. For me at least, the Double Dong is too thick for proper double-penetration so I prefer using it for vaginal stimulation only.
The Double Dong is certainly not a toy I recommend for everyone. It provides the best experience for those looking for a manageable "casual" girth or a toy to gradually push their limits. Size kings and queens will probably enjoy the experience it provides, but your average John and Jane Doe may think otherwise. Unfortunately, I can't give an accurate opinion when it comes to sharing it, but at least from my experiences, it makes for a stimulating and exciting solo play (and quite an impressive show too for anyone watching). Keep your limits in mind when considering whether or not to buy this, and if you don't plan on double penetrative play, you may be better off selecting a different toy altogether.
Summary
Size: ★★★★☆
Cost: ★★★★★
Texture: ★★★★★
Material: ★★★★☆
Ease of use: ★★★☆☆
Effectiveness: ★★★★☆
Final rating: ★★★★☆
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